Matt & Heidi Plus 2
In light of all the recent reality TV shows that have been gaining popularity in recent years, I pondered for a minute this morning:
“What would it be like if Heidi and I had our own reality show modeled after Jon & Kate Plus 8?”
There would be probably be some hilarious interaction on the “interview couch” between me and Heidi while I interject random “phhhrttt” noises when she’s trying to talk. Then there would be the scene where my 3 year old son Connor uses his golf club to stir the toilet and run around in his underwear with his cowboy hat yelling “emergency, emergency, the sky is falling!”. My 1 year old son Hunter, who has a whole lot more running through his head than we realize, would probably be attempting a back flip off the couch just to show he has no fear.
Yeah….TLC probably isn’t going to be knocking down my door, but I was pretty sad today when I heard that Jon and Kate were separating. It seems like for months I couldn’t even buy tic-tac’s at the grocery store without seeing a tabloid about the Jon & Kate rumours. As soon as there were some photographs taken that raised some potential questions regarding the health of their marriage, it seemed like the media went nuts with an agenda to split them up. While Kate says that divorce was probably a chapter that would have played out whether the cameras were there or not, the media frenzy surely didn’t help.
Once the media decides that you are on their list, there is no rest. They camp out and take random pictures of you blinking, sneezing, etc. so that they can have this horrible picture to post to an article whenever you do something they consider bad. They go after how you look (did you see that hair? should a mom wear that?) and then they question your motives (why did they go there? how could she spank her kids? where’s their spouse?). It reaches a point where they probably felt like there could be a story no matter what they did.
One of the quotes that really got to me is when Kate said “My goal is peace for the kids. If peace needs to brought about by this (i.e. separation/divorce), then I’m in agreeance.” I immediately thought of my wife Heidi and my boys and I determined in mind: “I refuse to have this by our story”. God is peace and His Kingdom is ruled by peace. If peace is brought about because I or my wife leave, I don’t believe that’s true peace; rather, it is the absence of conflict.
I need to love my wife and family more than my ministry, my writing, my job, or my blog. I love to blog and I love to minister, but if those things are placed on a scale with my family on the other side, it’s not even a close decision. That’s why I don’t feel guilty if my blog goes 2 months without a post yet my
3 year old son Connor still goes to bed saying how much fun he had. That’s why I don’t feel condemnation if my phone is turned off so I can wrestle with my 1 year son Hunter on the floor. I lose no sleep over missing tv shows, postponing my book/writing projects, etc. yet my wife can hold her head high and know that I cherish her and truly love her.
So, while there may never be a “Matt & Heidi plus 2″ show for the world to watch, I’m watching a story unfold before my own eyes of my family coming closer together and seeking God. My son Connor had been getting up in the middle of the night afraid and wanted to sleep in our bed. After a few nights of this, I talked to him at prayer time and the following was our conversation:
Daddy: “Connor, whenever daddy is afraid, I ask Jesus to help me not to be afraid and He’s right there!”.
Connor: “Daddy, where is Jesus?”
Daddy: “He’s sitting right here”. (Note: when I said that, the presence of God filled my son’s room and I knew that Jesus, God of all, was watching this interaction with my 3 year old boy)
Connor: “But I can’t see Him”.
Daddy: “Someday you may see Him (alive, face-to-face), but I can tell you that Jesus is sitting right here” (Note: don’t squash your son’s dreams of being able to see Jesus just because we don’t have the faith to believe for the impossible at times)
Connor: “Oh, ok”
Daddy: “So if you wake up in the middle of the night and you are afraid, say ‘Jesus, please help me not to be afraid’.”
The next morning, Connor slept in past 7 AM (which is a rare blessing!). He walked over to my wife Heidi and said:
”Mommy, Jesus helped me not to be afraid last night!”.
I will have a home filled with peace and I will have a home where the presence of God feels comfortable resting.
P.S. I’m hoping that the “Matt & Heidi plus 2″ name will work for a while. I know that “Matt & Heidi plus 3″ kinda rhymes, but hopefully people would watch the show whether the title name rhymes or not. :-p
Steve Hogan said,
June 23, 2009 at 9:22 am
Great post! I once took a class called Intro to Ministry in College. One day the professor put 5 words on the board:
me, ministry, Jesus, kids, and wife
Back then we all got it wrong one way or another. But now it’s plain to see the order:
Jesus, wife, kids, ministry, me
God bless, bro!
mattlegere said,
June 23, 2009 at 12:20 pm
Thanks for the comment Steve. It’s such a major paradigm change, but a generation of bitter, angry “preacher’s kids” should serve as an example of how important Godly priorities and order is. I refuse to let this be my story! And I refuse it to be your story! Let’s model a “Jesus/wife/kids/ministry/me” paradigm for our generation and the next. ~ Matt Legere
jeffsdeepthoughts said,
June 30, 2009 at 7:55 am
I don’t want to criticize the poor woman merely for the sake of criticism. It’s clear that her intentions are good,
But it seems like that’s the wrong kind-of peace to bring your kids.
mattlegere said,
June 30, 2009 at 2:37 pm
I agree Jeff. It seems that media has had enough criticism of them to last for 4 lifetimes. I even hesitated to use the reference that I did; however, the quote that she used was definitely worth mentioning. So do you attend Pastor Marty’s church in Holden?
jeffsdeepthoughts said,
July 2, 2009 at 8:10 am
Yup. I attend Pastor Marty’s church. I found your blog via his. Thanks for the enlightening reading.